(no subject)

[ellyssian]

Rachel had her first brush with urban legend (of sorts), a meme of the sort of thing children tell each other because another child told them and it scared the wits out of them or upset them greatly, so they feel the need to pass it on.

In short: Three people were such great friends that they pledged that if one died, they would all die. Then one girl was killed in a car accident. The second (male? female?) took their own life by slicing their throat. The third was trying to decide what to do, and was near a river with sharp pointy rocks. A cat mauled him to death.

Ah! the pleasant things third grade girls discuss!

I explained a bit about urban legends and stories like that, as well as discussed why focusing on life is a bit more healthy than focusing on death - examples that came up in the discussion were Romeo & Juliet, my own Tribute to a Life Long Past (which deals with two people, one struggling through the loss of the other), Seamus Kennedy's Unicorn Song, some guy who was pinned up, died, and still had a positive attitude (when he could have dropped fiery mountains on those who killed him), The Life of Brian, and R'vanith, the rainbow dragon.

After two such discussions, some tears, and working herself up in knots that she might not get to sleep and might miss the bus and all she could think of was sad thoughts, she finally relaxed and worked her way past the stress and went back to bed.

Comments

[gwynraven.livejournal.com]

You know Seamus Kennedy?! That is so cool. I went to high school with his son, Damian. I think Damian was a little pissed that I was more interested in his father than I was in him. *g*

[ellyssian.livejournal.com]

Rachel and I just saw him perform Sunday!

[gwynraven.livejournal.com]

He's wonderful. I used to have a complete set of his CDs (birthday present from Damian), but they got stolen along with most of my other Celtic music CDs a few years ago.

[(Anonymous)]

Sounds alot like my daughter. She gets all worked up about these kinds of things. I think, particularly with all the disasters that have happened recently and all the teachers talking about them, it's a tough moment right now for many kids to come to terms with death and dying.

I know last week, while we were going out to dinner, my daughter piped up with a comment about how her teacher explained how people had jumped out of the World Trade Center buildings. I thought it was a detail my kids didn't really need to hear...But, then again...maybe I'm wrong in hiding the realism. At any rate, we had to explain that while some people did do that, that wasn't their only option and that fear makes people do things that aren't always rational. Not a discussion I really wanted to have with my melodramatic child.

I think you did a good job at trying to calm her fears.

[ladyazure.livejournal.com]

Opps...Sorry..I posted the annony comment..I thought I was logged in. :P

[ellyssian.livejournal.com]

Someday I'll actually pick up a CD or two of his - other than that, I'll have to settle for a performance once a year at the Celtic Classic (although most other years I've tried to catch at least two of his performances: one during the day for the kids, one at night for the adults!)

[ellyssian.livejournal.com]

Melodrama might have been a good choice for Rachel's middle name, but we went with Laurana instead! =)

We don't try to hide things, but we also don't go into grisly details - and the tough part is remaining hopeful (especially if, or when, you don't feel it yourself) even when there's nothing positive about an issue.

[ladyazure.livejournal.com]

Yeah..it's hard to guage just how much is too much..Recently my daughter's been on the, "I don't want you to die" kick...Which I hate...but I assure her I have many good long years in me left. I'm as healthy as a person of my age can get, and there's nothing that is going to cause me any early termination. She still worries, but I guess that's normal..I remember when I was her age (she's 5) worrying about the loss of one of my parents.

Mostly we just try to let her know that death is a natural part life and that we all must go eventually. That it's not that we live but what we choose to do with our lives that makes more of a difference and is more important than the events of living and dying.